(above picture from the Butter and Eggs Days Parade- Millie and Griffin rode on the floatwhile Brian rode an artbike alongside)
It's been three months since my last post. We all crept away from cancer for a while.
We crept so far that in May, Brian and I both (individually) were pulled back with dramatic, panicked realization that Millie's winter cough had not subsided after over 8 weeks. This realization woke Brian in the night, with a fear that he kept to himself. A few days later it swept over me and nearly buckled my knees as I boarded an airplane for a business meeting. You see, Ewings Sarcoma spreads to the lungs if a rogue cell was not destroyed with chemo. The thought of going back in, of not being finished, of returning to the battle and the terrifying thought of losing- all overwhelms and hides, waiting to surface in our heads on waves of anxiety. With this fear washing over me, I gripped the armrests on my flight and waited, staring ahead, until landing and a call to our nurse caseworker could be made.
Within days, Millie had a chest XRay in Petaluma- results: clean. no spots, no concern. Just a long winter cough. Like normal kids.
It's going to be like this for years, maybe decades. A pain in the leg, a lingering cough, fatigue, headaches- everything will send us into a tailspin. We gladly put up with this, of course, and hope that each future panic is equally unfounded.
Millie, meanwhile, goes forward happily. She is positive, cheerful, and sweet most every waking minute. Her hair has grown out to curl around the nape of her neck and over her ears, and she goes hatless everywhere. She eagerly reads books, works on math, and has done very well in school. I find it interesting that she has, of late, picked up many of the childrens' cancer books that she ignored over the months of treatment. She reads over and over again these picture books and stories of other kids- trying to make sense, no doubt, of what she went through.
We just had our 3 month MRI appointment last week. The scans are detailed and record images from the hips through both legs to the feet. The results: clean. Even the areas of distress and bone marrow depletion from November's scan seemed improved, according to the radiologist.
We're waiting now for an appointment with a rehab specialist to work on Millie's dropfoot. Although she's made great gains, the foot is still not lifting properly. We'll report on the doctor's findings here shortly.
Thank you for following our blog, and for all your hopes and prayers for Millie. We are lifted by your love.
